Expecting? Or Hoping?

Hope, for me, has always felt confusing. I remember in college wanting to create a magazine for Teen girls that showed real teens, not photoshopped ones. I thought the best name would be "Esperanza!" I always thought esperanza meant hope in spanish but recently found out that it can also mean expectation. Interesting, eh?

I write and share about hope and expectations quite a bit. For me, they are intertwined and I don't always have a good grasp on the difference. I want to just hope but more often than not it turns into an expectation.

Ada's braces over time...or technically called SMOs or is it AFOs?

Next week Ada will see her doctor who checks on her gross motor skills. He also checks her
Atlantoaxial Instability (AI). For years Ada has had to wear plastic forms around foot that insert in her shoes. They look terribly uncomfortable and she can only fit in one pair of shoes. I continue to just go to appointments and do what they suggest which in itself can be nerve-wracking. We've gone to a doctor who suggested this contraption that wired up her leg but then when we went to get fitted the service provider felt it wasn't necessary. Another time a high brace was suggested but then after we took the brace home Ada refused to walk. She would stick her butt in the air and walk on her hands and fit.

I'm realizing as this appointment approaches I am really hoping for just shoe inserts. I'd like to expand her shoe wardrobe a bit and give her the chance to put her own shoes on. The braces can be so cumbersome. So, this week I am hoping and trying not to expect. Will you hope with me? I'll let you know what happens next week!